[Now he's going to shift over to sit beside you, and put an arm around your shoulders.]
You're going to have to find your own way of confronting that fact, Kaz, and your own way of continuing your existence without thinking that you do not deserve to live the way that you do.
[ He hadn't intended to be the lost little puppy tonight. And tonight he looks way younger than twenty, much younger than he's ever looked. He can accept the deaths in their line of work, because it can and will happen. Deaths because it was just your time? He's not too sure how to deal with those, just yet. ]
It's kind of impossible to do that anyway, since you've got a lot more years ahead of you. Just remember that acceptance is a process. Everything is, really.
[There is no absolute, especially when you're practically immortal.]
[ Hum. Kaz drains the last of his Milkshake as he thinks about the possibility that maybe the one thing that's constant in the life of an immortal is change, so he falls quiet for a bit. ]
[ He smiles at Rethe, and gives him a quick brohug before leaving the same way he came. He has a sinking feeling that he will definitely not wake up early enough later. ]
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ktotheatothez) wrote2014-04-10 05:26 am
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[Understatement of the Century, Rethe Kyriff-Clayce.
Understatement of the Century.]
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So I guess... That I'll be alive longer than most. Y'know Mamita said I was going to outlive her...
[ There's that quiver in his voice... ]
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Then, softly:]
Yes. Yes, you will.
[Kaz was now going to outlive a lot of people. It's a truth that Rethe could not hide him from, but he would certainly try to help.]
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[ There's a lost look on his face now, one that's showed itself briefly to the Hounds on occasion, but hasn't stuck 'til now. ]
I get that this is a good thing. It means time with the people I love the most. But what happens when they start...
[ Paolo, Jen, Gideon, Neeka. He can't bring himself to say it: that someday they'll be gone. ]
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You're going to have to find your own way of confronting that fact, Kaz, and your own way of continuing your existence without thinking that you do not deserve to live the way that you do.
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[ He hadn't intended to be the lost little puppy tonight. And tonight he looks way younger than twenty, much younger than he's ever looked. He can accept the deaths in their line of work, because it can and will happen. Deaths because it was just your time? He's not too sure how to deal with those, just yet. ]
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Well... first, maybe it would be good to try and figure out what life means to you.
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[ He's pensive, a little confused. ]
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[Smiling, as he's going for another cigarette.]
You're going to live much longer. Yes, things will change, but...
[Lighting up.]
Change will be slower for you. You're going to see a lot more, and you're going to need some way of approaching it that works for you.
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Slow and steady, then. Can't afford to be fifteen again and all too willing to run and hide from this.
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It's kind of impossible to do that anyway, since you've got a lot more years ahead of you. Just remember that acceptance is a process. Everything is, really.
[There is no absolute, especially when you're practically immortal.]
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He has time, and he wants to see you through this. He'll only go when he thinks you're okay, or when you tell him that you're okay.]
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I should probably go. Josh and I have to be at Rhiannon tomorrow.
[ Shy smile coming from this one now. ]
Thanks, Rethe... Um... I might swing by sometimes, haven't heard you spin in a long while.
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[Smiles.]
I'd really like it if you came here more often. You're always welcome to watch me.
[Or to hang out, or to give him a call.]
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[ He smiles at Rethe, and gives him a quick brohug before leaving the same way he came. He has a sinking feeling that he will definitely not wake up early enough later. ]