Ah. I thought it was something like that. There are times that I forget that Brianna, for all the things she's been through, is still younger than me in some ways.
[He thinks about making it up to her, maybe an extended day out. And then he looks away for a bit because he has to ask.]
[Kaz gives Rethe's hand a gentle squeeze at that.]
But I didn't. I know I keep saying that I'm too stubborn to die, but sometimes I wonder if that really was the case. No use looking a gift horse in the mouth, though...
If it was not the case, though, what do you think it was?
[Questioning, in Rethe's opinion, was all part of the process. He was pretty sure that most of the others weren't attempting to ask Kaz about it, or were encouraging him to take it as it is.]
[Or at least, you seem like the type from what he has observed. It's very odd for this one, to be honest: the Malice Kings aren't exactly cuddly, and Rethe is more than content to be the recipient of casual affection, similar to the kind that he'd get from Calintz or Hikaru, and - more recently - Josh.]
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ktotheatothez) wrote2014-04-10 05:26 am
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[He's been meaning to ask.]
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Josh was worried about Brianna. I think he felt that I'd be able to cheer her up a little.
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[He thinks about making it up to her, maybe an extended day out. And then he looks away for a bit because he has to ask.]
I guess you felt it when I fell?
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I did. [Then, a little louder.] I also felt it, though, when Hikaru caught you.
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[He says, sadness in his voice, and then he amends it.]
...left you all behind.
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But you didn't.
[Softly, but firmly.]
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But I didn't. I know I keep saying that I'm too stubborn to die, but sometimes I wonder if that really was the case. No use looking a gift horse in the mouth, though...
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[Questioning, in Rethe's opinion, was all part of the process. He was pretty sure that most of the others weren't attempting to ask Kaz about it, or were encouraging him to take it as it is.]
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[It makes him slouch a little bit in his seat, sipping on his just-arrived milkshake. He's not having as much alcohol, he's got a minor on-board now.]
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Can I be blunt with you, Kaz?
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[Sipping on his milkshake quietly now, listening intently]
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[There is no divine plan anymore. Everyone was responsible for themselves, and nothing had to make sense.]
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[Blinking owlishly at you, Rethe.]
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Those who care about you love you for you, and they happen to have the means of bringing you back if they so choose. But it's still because of you.
[Taking a drag from his cigarette, looking pensive.]
What you decide to make of this is also in your hands.
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[That same kind of sad-but-not-quite expression comes up on his face again.]
Does that mean I could've just as easily seen you instead of Hikaru that time?
[It's an innocent question, and he's gonna backpedal if you show any discomfort.]
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That's a possibility.
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Sorry, I really just couldn't sleep at all... I don't know what it is, but I just have this buzzing going on in my head.
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[This one doesn't really need to sleep. Besides, he's not too surprised to see Kaz out of sorts. Dying is a bit of a big thing.]
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[ He's going to sip quietly on his drink before he asks: ]
How're you holding up, though?
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[And to think that he had just gotten used to Aidan being around more often...]
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Still, he can adjust.]
Thanks. I really am okay, though.
[He's not putting up a front. Yes, he misses Aidan, but these things do happen.]
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[ He's easy with his affections, and you matter to him quite a bit, Rethe. ]
Maybe I wanted to give you a hug. I never have, after all.
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[Or at least, you seem like the type from what he has observed. It's very odd for this one, to be honest: the Malice Kings aren't exactly cuddly, and Rethe is more than content to be the recipient of casual affection, similar to the kind that he'd get from Calintz or Hikaru, and - more recently - Josh.]
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[ Well, that's the most indirect admission of friendship he's made. ]
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